Want to know how to totally fail as a full time travel family? How to make sure everything goes wrong, and your big dream of living abroad crashes and burns? You’ve come to the right place!
Whether you’re planning your first year of travel or an extended trip, I’ll show you exactly what to do to become the least successful full time travel family of all time in this anti-guide blog post!
Here are the top 10 “tips” to ensure your travel dreams and your new life go down in flames.
1. Pack Everything You Own
Everyone knows that full time travel families are super materialistic. We LOVE owning lots of stuff and making sure everyone can see it. We HATE a local storage unit and minimalism! If you want to fail as a full time travel family, make sure you pack everything you own.
It’s essential not only to keep all your belongings but to buy as much extra as possible before you leave.
These days, it’s totally easy to have containers with your furniture and travel gear shipped every time you move to different places or a new base. Isn’t it the best to always have all your material things with you, no matter where you go?! In the end, that’s what matters most.
Real Talk:
In reality, packing light is one of the best things you can do for your sanity. Full time family travel is about experiences, not stuff. Lugging around everything you own is exhausting and expensive. Trust me, you won’t miss half of those items after a few months. Downsizing makes it easier to adapt to new places, and let’s be honest, you don’t need that third pair of shoes for the kids.
2. Only Do What You Already Know
This tip is crucial! We all know the feeling—you try something new and end up disappointed. You don’t want that as a full time travel family, right? No one likes disappointment!
So, stick to what you already know. Visit countries you’ve been to before (the closer to home, the better), eat dishes you’re familiar with, and go to restaurants you’ve had good experiences with.
Sure, this means you’ll never discover anything new and will always go to the same convenient spots because “that’s what you’ve always done.” But hey, at least you won’t be disappointed and will always get exactly what you expect. Long live the comfort zone!
Real Talk:
Trying new things is what family travel is all about! Yes, sometimes it goes wrong (like ordering a “mystery dish” that no one likes or visiting the local night market that’s absolutely not toddler-friendly), but those unexpected moments are important. Pushing your comfort zone a little leads to growth, and you might just find your new favorite destination or food.
3. Never Plan Anything
Forget making detailed plans or scheduling day trips during your long-term travel. After all, who needs to know if the guest houses are fully booked or if you’re in a good place for young children? Planning is overrated, especially for full time travelers who love spontaneity. Every full time traveling family knows this. If you really want to live, go with the flow.
This is super important, especially for young kids. The less you plan ahead, choose accommodations, or book public transportation, the more exciting and affordable your trip will be. After all, who needs to know where they’re sleeping tonight?
Small children and older kids alike LOVE waiting for hours at bus stops. And parents LOVE paying extra for last-minute bookings in peak season. It’s a win-win situation, right?
Real Talk:
Okay, going with the flow sounds romantic, but with kids, a little bit of planning is essential. You don’t need to over-schedule every minute, but knowing where you’re sleeping tonight? Pretty important. Sometimes, those spontaneous adventures are fun, but they’re even better when you have a backup plan and avoid paying a fortune for last-minute accommodations. My workflow: Having a rough plan but leaving room for surprises!
4. Avoid All Local Interactions
Why bother talking to locals when you can stay in your own bubble? We all know that locals, no matter the country, are mostly unfriendly and want to be left alone. They don’t speak your language and have different cultures and customs. Gross!
I recommend building a community of your own people at every new place you go. Post in international Facebook groups in your own language, ensuring only people from your country reply. Jackpot! This way, you’ll always be surrounded by people like you, speaking your language, and everything will feel just like home.
Real Talk:
Honestly, it makes me sad when I see so many expats just sticking to their own groups. It even feels a bit disrespectful—why travel if you’re not going to embrace the local culture? Step out of that expat bubble!
5. Always Eat at Tourist Traps
You can usually spot them from a mile away: places offering international food (with a 30-page menu), pictures next to every meal, and high prices. Perfect!
This is where you should eat. What some call “tourist traps” are a full time travel family’s go-to.
Here, you get the Western food you’re used to, at prices you’re used to, and maybe the waiter will even greet you in your native language! Wow! What more could you want?
Plus, this way, you avoid the disappointment of trying local food. That can only end in disaster anyway.
Real Talk:
Sure, sometimes the kids just want pizza, but you’d be surprised at what they’ll try when you introduce them to local food! I’d much rather pick an authentic local restaurant or a high-quality Western one over a tourist trap any day—it’s so much more worth it!
6. Stick to a Super Tight Schedule
We’ve all been there: you’re in a new place, and it’s so nice that you just want to relax and do what you feel like. The result? Terrible guilt because you didn’t visit every single sight. And what will the other think when you didn’t see every single landmark?!
Here’s how to do it better: cram as many activities as possible into each day! Especially on travel days or after long flights. Slow travel is for beginners!
Trust me, you’ll never feel more productive than when you check off 20 attractions in one day. Who’s the top professional in full time family travel now?!
Real Talk:
Cramming too much into one day is a fast track to travel burnout. Especially when traveling with kids, slower travel lets you truly enjoy each moment. It’s okay to miss a few sights. In fact, having downtime gives kids a chance to process all they’re experiencing.
7. Never Budget or Track Expenses
Don’t worry about monthly expenses or how much money you’re spending. Who cares what things cost?! Exactly! YOLO. And life, especially as a full time travel family, should be fun.
Just think about how many likes your social media pics from that luxury hotel will get! Who cares for additional cost and what your bank account looks like? You don’t. And that’s the way it should be.
Just imagine how exciting it’ll be when the money runs out in the middle of nowhere!
So I suggest this: never track your family expenses, live day by day, and try to never open your banking app. Better yet, delete it completely!
Real Talk:
Let’s be real—budgeting is not the enemy. In fact, keeping an eye on your monthly expenses means you can travel longer and do more of what you love. Sure, splurging occasionally is fun, but knowing where your money is going helps avoid the stress of running out of funds in the middle of your trip. There’s nothing glamorous about scrambling to find money for an emergency flight home because you didn’t keep track.
8. Ignore the Kids’ Needs
Who came first? That’s right! You and your partner. The kids came later, so they should just go along quietly. No one wants to deal with boring indoor playgrounds and kid-friendly activities.
So, make sure the kids go wherever the parents want to go, whether they like it or not.
One important thing: if you ignore their nap times, their jet lag after switching time zones, and their cries for ice cream, it will make them stronger, tougher people, and strengthen your parent-child bond. If the kids know they don’t matter, they’ll be much easier to handle.
Real Talk:
Happy kids = happy parents. Ignoring their needs won’t make them “tougher,” but it will make everyone miserable. And guess what? Sometimes, those boring indoor playgrounds turn out to be a lifesaver after a long day of sightseeing. Grab your Kindle and enjoy the downtime!
9. Always Go for the Cheapest Option
World travel is expensive enough, and don’t forget inflation! So, you have to save wherever you can.
It’s super important to always choose the cheapest option for everything. The cheapest hotel is in the red-light district? Perfect! The kids will learn something about local culture!
The cheapest transport takes 30 hours, involves a night bus, and four layovers? Great! The cheapest nanny has never done it before, but she’s available? Book her now!
Personally, I think there’s nothing better than saving, saving, saving. The well-being of the family is totally secondary.
Real Talk:
Especially when it comes to hotels, we’ve learned it’s worth paying more for a good night’s sleep. Sometimes, spending a little extra on safety, comfort, or convenience is the smart choice—especially when you’ve got young kids with you.
10. Avoid Community and New Friendships
As a full time travel family, you’re better than everyone else anyway. So it’s hard to find people on your level. Besides, you’re never alone as a family. You’ve got each other, so you don’t need anyone else.
Making new friends as a traveling family or getting to know local communities is totally unnecessary and a huge waste of time.
It’s best not to even say hello when dropping the kids off at the new daycare or joining a local sports club. That way, you can avoid making as few connections as possible.
Real Talk:
Yes, even as a family, you can feel lonely sometimes—it’s so important to get fresh influences from outside. Kids thrive when they have friends to play with, and meeting new people makes the journey feel more like real family life, rather than just a constant state of transition.
Conclusion: How to NOT Succeed as a Full Time Travel Family
If you’re truly committed to failing as a full time travel family, these 10 “tips” will ensure your full time travel dreams go hilariously wrong.
Pack too much, avoid planning, and ignore your kids’ needs—it’s the perfect recipe for travel chaos!
Of course, we know you’ll probably do the exact opposite and end up thriving on the road. But hey, where’s the fun without a little disaster, right?
What were your biggest failures on the road as a traveling family? What were your best lessons? Share them with me in the comments!
Thanks for reading and making me part of your day!
Yours, Lulu
