Do you plan to avoid Digital Nomad mistakes at all costs? I hear you! Over the past four years as a Digital Nomad Family, we’ve made an insane amount of mistakes that have cost a lot of money, nerves, and time. But there were also some right decisions. Today, I want to share with you the ten most important lessons learned from our life as a Digital Nomad Family.
Digital Nomad Mistakes You Should Avoid
1. The cheapest way is rarely the best way
Sure, when you’re a backpacker couple traveling in your twenties, you have less of a problem with a noisy, dirty hotel room in the middle of the party district. As a Digital Nomad family of 4 with a baby and toddler, it’s different. A night of good sleep is worth so much more than saving a few euros.
Of course, you don’t have to live large permanently but treat yourself to something nice, especially after long trips or when you have to work a lot.
2. Don’t plan too far in advance
This is one of the Digital Nomad mistakes that has probably cost us the most money so far. I love booking houses, schools, hotels, and flights far in advance. But the life of a Digital Nomad is very flexible and sometimes unpredictable. Maybe you want to stay longer in one place, but you can’t because you already planned the whole trip and paid for it. Or perhaps you decide to stay longer and have to pay high rebooking fees to the airline or even lose an entire stay on Airbnb.
This is annoying and so expensive. Therefore, decide, book, and pay in the short to medium term whenever it makes sense. I don’t even want to add up how many flight and hotel vouchers we now have worldwide.
3. If something is good, stick with it
This sounds so boring, I know. But life as a Digital Nomad Family is exhausting enough. And when you’ve found a co-working space, a nanny, and an apartment you love, stick with it. Yes, maybe there’s a better option somewhere. Still, the next relocation is coming soon anyway, so you’ll have to plan everything again. Save your energy!
On the other hand, if you don’t like something, quit it as soon as possible. Sometimes, it’s more exhausting to think about renting another house than just doing it.
4. Don’t stay too short in one place
If you live a nomadic life with kids, do slow travel! We found out that three months in one place is the magic period: the effort of moving was worth it, you had enough time to get to know a place, and a bit of everyday life and routine could set in. At the same time, it’s still not long enough to get bored.
My tip: As a Digital Nomad family, you can also spend six months+ in a country and change the place once. This way, you don’t have to adjust entirely to a new culture and language, but you can still explore a new area.
5. Don’t schedule visitors at times when you are new to a place
Visitors in moderation are great. And even more so when you already know a place. Because visitors always mean work. The person has taken a long flight, spent money, and expects you to have unlimited time (and an activity schedule). It’s too bad if you’re busy organizing your new life at the moment. Stress is preprogrammed.
6. Communicate with visitors what they can expect
Most people think that as a Digital Nomad family, you only sit on the beach and have a vacation. The fact that you work and have a daily routine is new to them. Therefore, communicate clearly what the visitor can expect and how much time you will have for them.
Even if it’s hard sometimes, you need to set boundaries. You know that the aunt is dependent and will be like another child to you? Then she should only come when you really have time and feel like it. Not when she can take a week off. It is your life and your nerves!
7. Don’t have too high expectations when you visit the old home
When we returned to Germany for the first time after 2.5 years, we thought that all our old friends and family would drop everything to spend time with us and take our children. Well, that wasn’t always the case, and we were quite frustrated in the end (of course, there were exceptions!).
Our conclusion: Just as we have an everyday life, the people “at home” also have a life with priorities. That’s ok. And that also shows us again how important it is to set boundaries the other way around when we are visited.
8. Don’t expect that everyone can understand your Digital Nomad Family Life
This point was the hardest lesson. Why does the contact with the best friend flatten out? Why do I feel like I don’t understand them anymore? Have our conversations always been so superficial? Why do they get so upset about such trivialities?
It is pretty normal for people to change, especially when their lifestyles are so far apart. No one will understand how you felt when you waited for 6 hours with two children in the immigration office, wondering if you would be allowed to stay in the country. Hardly anyone can understand how lonely you sometimes feel when you arrive in a new place and don’t know anyone.
Likewise, the problems and feelings of the people back home feel so far away and often incomprehensible to you. It is totally normal that not all relationships can withstand this dramatic life change. But the great thing is that some even become closer or reach a new level. Please don’t be frustrated, but be grateful for every deep connection (I know, easier said than done!).
9. Decide wisely to who you give your time to
Speaking of relationships – the topic of social interaction and friends is a huge one for Digital Nomads. Every time we move to a new place, we start from scratch (unless we’ve been there before and already have a social network). We don’t know other families and have no sports buddies or cool co-workers. As a family, you have less time for friends anyway, so choose your relationships wisely!
Don’t invest your time in the loud, self-centered personalities who only decorate themselves with the next sparkling “friend” or party. Look for real people who have the potential to become long-lasting friendships. For us as a Digital Nomad family, that means being alone a lot more than others. But when we make connections, they are real. And we don’t give them away anymore.
10. In each place, find one thing you want to pursue
The significant advantage of being a Digital Nomad Family is being in so many new places. The nice thing is that every area has something different to offer. So use it! Are you living in a surfing location for the next three months? Get on the board! Your new home is in the middle of the jungle? Find a guide and learn about the botanic.
My husband learned freediving in Koh Tao, I started drawing in Chiang Mai, and our 5-yo went to a nature class every week in the jungle of Koh Phangan. On the other hand, it can be very frustrating when you’re desperately trying to continue a hobby in a place that wasn’t made for it. And isn’t it nice to learn something new?!
What were your biggest mistakes or best decisions as a Digital Nomad family? I’m curious! Let me know in the comments! Thank you for reading!
Hi there!
I have just found your blog while searching in the net for digital nomad with kids and I am very moved by it for very personal reasons. My family of husband + wife and two kids aged 12 and 10 have just returned this last Saturday to Berlin from a one gap year where we have traveled Africa and India but also spent quality time in our home country Spain and in Portugal.
We have worked as digital nomads during this year and homeschooled our kids who enrolled in a Spanish online school and despite having the best year of our lives, it was not always easy. There are big black spots caused by stress trying to find a balance between work, sight see and homeschool (oh! these horrible assignment dates!) Now our gap year is almost ending (we came back to our home in Berlin so that kids find peace to learn and prepare for their final exams in May) and we have to decide our next move.
I just simply do not want to go back to our old life in Berlin so we have considered to move back to Spain, but then, there again we will fall back into the system of the sedentary lifestyle with all what it involves (maybe a job at a physical address, for sure kids in a physical school with all ups and downs.) There is so much we have gained during this year on the move, I just do not wish to give all that up! So I am looking for ways to convince by skeptic and very much against husband to continue at least for one year more moving around. So far our kids say yes to that (which is a big plus). My husband biggest concern is that we are taking old friends away from our kids and we are not allowing new friendships to grow by constantly moving around. Well, he has certainly a point. Our kids are older now! So my big question comes: how do you connect with other similar minded digital nomads when you travel? Via FB? Do you go to Coworking spaces and look out for other families there? To coffee shops? If we can get the certainty that our kids will get to make new friends on travels, he might change his mind.
Hi Cristina, thank you so much for your comment and thank you for your openness! Your story sounds very interesting and exciting! You’ve definitely had more homeschooling experience in that gap year than we have. Our kids are still little, after all.
To your question “How do you find contacts?”: Yes, you got it right, Facebook plays a big role. What has worked well for us so far is to make a Facebook post even before we arrive at a place. For this, we just picked out the local groups for digital nomads or local families. Many places also have special meet-ups for teen families. Here in Koh Phangan, for example, there is a really big community of families with older children who meet regularly (even the kids alone with supervision, it’s called “Teens of Phangan”). My conclusion: You definitely can’t go wrong with another year! If you are worried about not getting enough connections, then you should put some energy into it and actively search for these communities. To be honest, I rather had the experience that it became too much social activity for me sometimes, and I was happy to hang out just with my family for a week. 😀